I can't believe Graham has been home for 6 months already! Things have changed so much in such a short amount of time. He has adjusted and bonded so easily and we are thankful for that. Life has been so busy that I haven't been keeping up on here with how things are progressing. So, I figured I should probably do an update for everyone that has followed this journey and prayed for Graham and our family over the past couple of years.
Like I said, life is busy. We have 3 preschool aged children in the house right now and that leads to, um, chaos. Typical days consist of spilled milk, coloring on walls, toy bins being dumped out, spilled water, dresser drawers being emptied, and playing the "mine" game over every object in sight. These three have a lot of fun together. On the other hand, it is awesome to see the little helpers that they will all be in just a few short years. They love to help unload clean dishes from the dishwasher and sort the silverware into the drawer. They can set the table by bringing out all of the dishes (their older sisters just straighten things up a bit when they are done). Graham knows what "dirty" means, so if I hand him a used washcloth and tell him "dirty" he will run it up to the laundry room for me. He is also becoming a pro at scrubbing all of his crayon drawings off of the windows and walls and picking up the toys he dumps out.
Graham came home eating only soft textured foods and small bite sized crackers like goldfish or cheerios. We went through quite a few stage 3 baby food jars in those early days. He also would eat pretty much any food we set in front of him, we couldn't find anything he didn't like. Now, he is eating the same foods as everyone else at meals and, as he has realized that there will always be more food to eat later, he has started to become more picky. Any kind of bread is not his favorite food, but he will eat it. If we are not watching, he will quickly empty the meat and cheese out of a sandwich and eat it quick leaving the bread behind. He also HATES pickles. We are still working through almost daily tantrums at meal times, but it is slowly improving. We don't always know what sets him off, but we are getting better at figuring it out. Cutting his food up on his plate is a big no-no. He also doesn't seem to like his foods mixed together. Peas in his mac and cheese can cause a melt-down, on the side and he will eat everything just fine.
Health wise, Graham is doing wonderful. We have not discovered any serious health problems at all. His thyroid is functioning perfectly (which was a concern based on a review from a specialist that reviewed his medical records before the adoption)! He got glasses shortly after coming home, but we have some more work to do on actually wearing them. His hearing is being rechecked soon, but appears to be fine. He has been super healthy. He has had a few colds here and there, but has fought them off better than some of our other kids. He was also the only one in the family to not get sick at all when we had a very nasty stomach bug move through the house last month. We are still working on getting his vitamin D up to an acceptable level, so he takes that supplement every day along with calcium and ginkgo biloba (which has really helped with his concentration and ability to learn). Praising God for an amazingly healthy son.
Communication has been our biggest struggle. Graham came home speaking only a couple of words. In our visits with him he had learned to say the words hi, hello, mama, and dada. We were told by the dr. at his baby house and by our translator that was working with us that he was not speaking any Russian words. After 6 months he can now say all of the following words (and signs some too). He is also starting to mimic a ton of sounds and words. He is currently doing speech therapy once a week. A lot of these words are spoken in "Graham-ese" and only understandable by us, but he is saying them!
Abby
All done (signs only)
Amen
Baby
Ben
Book
Brie
Bubble
Bye
Car
Cut
Dada
Drink (signs only)
Ear
Eat
Go
Hello
Hi
Laina – “nuh-nuh”
Mama
More (speaks and signs)
No
Nose
Out
Pee
Play
Please (speaks and signs)
Poop
Pray
Puppy
Riah
Thank you (signs only)
Up
Wow
Yay
Yes
When Graham came home he was terrified of our cat and dog. This surprised me as we saw cats wandering the halls of his baby home while we were there. By the end of the summer he was chasing Albert the cat around outside and just recently he has stopped trying to climb up my legs when Titus the dog runs over to say hi. He will now laugh at the dog and put up with him. I'm hoping this summer he will be comfortable enough to pet and play with him.
We put Graham straight into a twin bed with a rail on it when we brought him home. Within weeks I was on craigslist searching for a second crib and one of those zippered tents to put over the top! We ended up not buying those and instead spent (sometimes hours) each night sitting at the end of his bed saying, "nigh-night, lay down," until he fell asleep. Then, we would put up two baby gates in the doorway, one on top of the other, to avoid middle of the night exploring. That was an exhausting time that felt like it would never end. Slowly over the last several months he has become a pretty good sleeper. After our bedtime routine he knows to climb in bed and stay there. No gates are needed anymore. He usually stays put right in his bed (or at least in his room) until everyone is allowed to get out of bed at 7:30. He hears people stirring and knows he can get up too then. On Friday nights all of our kids spend the night sleeping in the family room watching a movie and he usually does fine with that too. I think he was a bit confused at first after all that time of trying to get him to sleep in his own bed. He didn't know what to do when we would set up his pillow and blanket on the floor in another room! He is catching on quick though and getting better about staying put there too.
It was hard bringing home a four year old that had never been exposed to so many things. The oven and stove top were a fascination, as were lamps, outlets, and the fireplace. I don't think he had ever seen any of these things before. We are used to teaching our kids from the time they are a baby that they may not touch things or that an oven is hot. I am used to a two year old backing up when I open an oven door, but when Graham came home he would run over to see what was going on. Thankfully, all of the "newness" of these things has worn off and with a little training we made it through that stage without any accidents.
What Graham loves:
toys that make noise - He will walk around ALL DAY LONG with a toy up to his ear. Phones are a huge hit. If it has lights too, even better.
music and dancing - Apparently God noticed the lack of dancing genes in our family. Not a single one of us had a gift for movement, rhythm, or coordination, but Graham has some moves!
tickling - I have never met someone that had a giggle attached to every single nerve ending on their body. Scratching his back, rubbing lotion on his hands and feet, or changing his diaper can all send him into a fit of laughter. And he totally has the best giggle ever.
Riah - He loooooves his baby sister. I think that the two of them are on the same level in so many ways that they have just bonded. The first few weeks that he was home we would catch them having "conversations" together in a language only the two of them understood. They sit next to each other in the van now and we often hear them laughing back and forth at each other.
bath time - Well, what kid doesn't like bath time? He is so awesome about it though, doesn't mind a bit getting his hair rinsed or anything (he usually laughs). He also came home a pro at scrubbing behind his ears. We often say we would love to be a fly on the wall in his old baby home and see what/how they were teaching those kids.
touch - Hugs, kisses, anything. He soaks it all up. When he is sitting on my lap facing out he will lean back and press his cheek against mine. Then he will reach up and stroke my other cheek. Totally melts my heart every time he does it.
washing - Graham loves to wash and clean. I think his favorite toy may be a wet washcloth. He will wash his body down top to bottom. He will wash walls, chairs, and tables. He will sit down and clean all his toys. While the older kids and I do chores each morning I will often give him a washcloth and let him spot clean the kitchen cabinets and floor.
changing clothes - Graham would change his outfit 20 times a day if we let him. When we got our first batch of information on him at the beginning of the adoption process it said that he could dress and undress himself. I remember telling Brett that it probably wasn't a good thing if that was one of the few things they told us about him, LOL. I was right. He does not like to keep his clothes on. I finally figured out that button up shirts are a wonderful thing. As long as they are buttoned up to the top he cannot get them off. He can turn them around backwards, but at least the shirt is still on!
